[ call.me.patience ]

[ The Memories ]

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10.20.2010

RHYME THE RHYTHM

Why is my heart so light?

Why are the stars so bright?

Why do I weep at night?

And then I lose my might?

Whenever I feel so blue

I want to find a clue

I want to grasp the hue

That shows off the cue

What made me upset?

What put my life at stake?

Is death getting near?

Or is this just fear?

I don’t understand

But I want to make a stand

I need to understand

Before I make my stand

But this creeps me at night

Giving me another fright

I can’t take off from my flight

I can’t see what’s right

I think I need to sleep

Before someone will peep

I just have to take a rest

To end today’s test

I didn’t make a stand

For I didn’t understand

I still know I should have my stand

But I don’t want you to understand

Labels: faith, hurt, realizations, sad

+ yaNix + 10/20/2010 05:30:00 AM

WHEN YOUR FAMILY IS BROKEN, WHERE CAN YOU FIND THE PIECES?

What is a perfect family? Is your family perfect? Is there a perfect family?

Family, it’s composed of father, mother, child and/or children. However, some couples were not blessed to have children of their own. Others happen to have a very strange agreement in their family while a lot of families are separated, divided, broken.

When your family is broken what would you do? Would you cry it all out, succumb yourself to the pain, become indifferent, or cut the string that binds your earthly life?

In the world you live in having a broken family is no news anymore. All the people around you are having a similar or a quite similar problem as yours. Death is never the answer and must never be the only solution. However, there just comes a time wherein you think of all the possibilities that may happen. When you are all alone you will suddenly feel empty. You feel alone. You cannot even think of a happy memory anymore. Then you realized the presence of hatred.

Hating is part of life. It is not a mere emotion that fades away all of a sudden. It comes to your life easily and stays in your heart infinitely.

For once, you may have hated someone. So you submitted yourself to the pain thinking that it would ease everything. But it didn’t. Instead it worsens the unwanted feeling. You become apathetic or so you thought. Then in an instant, you'll feel nothing. You'll feel empty.

You started looking for people who could understand you, who could make you happy, or those who are willing to listen to your angst. And you were glad to find them. You don’t feel that same emptiness like before. But, you still feel like something is lacking. You don’t feel complete.

But really, when your family is broken where can you find the pieces? Can you still find it? If you do can you still fix it? Would it still perfectly fit like before? Where are the broken pieces? Where have they gone?

Labels: family, hurt, realizations, sad

+ yaNix + 10/20/2010 05:28:00 AM

FLASH BACK, FAST FORWARD

Past. What is it? Why do we have to think about it? Did it really happen or has become part of our life? Were all of those real or were part of our dreams?

A young lady wakes up.

She closes her eyes.

She rubs her eyes.

She opens her eyes.

She looks around the place.

She smiles.

Suddenly she’s worried.

She gets up her bed.

She runs to the mirror.

She stares at her face.

She starts crying.

She slaps her face.

Dreams. Are these a part of our reality? Are these true or just a vivid part of our imagination? Can we make it real?

She stops herself.

She looks back at the mirror again.

She smiles her widest smile.

She wipes her tears away.

She goes to the bathroom.

She bathes.

She cleans herself.

She dresses up.

She goes out.

She stares at the bright sun.

She waves her hand at the sun.

She starts walking.

Reality. These are what we always wanted. We don’t want lies or any crap. We want the real thing. We want the truth. But, when we know of a sad truth we plan to quit. We tend to lose our control.

The young lady continues walking.

As she moves forward she sees someone.

She couldn’t figure out who is it.

She knows she know that person.

She moves forward.

She sees the man clearly.

She doesn’t know what to do.

She walks away.

She goes back to her house.

She sees her mother.

She goes up to her room.

She locks the door.

She weeps for hours.

She talks to herself.

She asks herself why.

She lies on her bed.

She goes into deep thinking.

She hates herself for not doing anything.

She hates her father for doing a crazy thing.

She runs out of tears and sleeps.

Life. It’s given. Life is always unfair. To live is a gift, yes it is. But life is never fair. It is never that great. They say that it is fair, it’s good but it’s not. They say that life depends on how you see it. If you see it as black as your hair, then probably you would always have your bad day. If you see it as bright as the sun, then you would always have your happy days.

How can you say you’re happy when all you’re seeing are dead people or if not what you see are people who live, breathing yet couldn’t even figure out that they’re alive? How can you tell them to move on if they themselves couldn’t understand their life?